Collendina Report No 879

There are new rules about using the toilets. There is a cleaning regime where the toilets need to be vacated for a nine hour period each day.  This will still allow plenty of time to do the business.  For instance there is a two hour window for you to do the morning bog conveniently located mid morning however there will be no bowl sitting between 6:30 am and 9:30 am or between 11:30 am and 2:30 pm. Please hold all peeing until the afternoon session. This is a more generous 4 hrs, particularly for the midday "sun over the yardarm" drinkers. But from 6:30 pm until 9:30 pm no pointing Percy at the porcelain.  Thank You and may the flush be with you.

Toilet Humour